happy dead soldier day

I am sure that when people read that title, IF people even read it, that I’m going to get all sorts of hate comments and evil things said to me before they even read the post itself. I may also still get hateful remarks, but the thing about me is, I don’t care. I honestly don’t. I write what I know, I write what I feel. If people are willing to hate me for that without really knowing who I am, then so be it.

Now, back to the title of this post and my reason for writing it. Today is just that, it’s a day created for remembering those military personnel who have died while serving this country. Don’t get me wrong, as a child, we loved Memorial Day, because we were still in school at this time and it gave us an extra day off. Ironically, my son’s school has decided this year that they will attend Memorial Day for half of a day as a make-up day for bad weather we had last year in which they missed several days of school. Man, I said “day” a lot in that last sentence.

We’ve never really partied hard for Memorial Day or anything like that, and we’ve rarely used it as an excuse to cook out. This year, we are supposed to be having friends over and grilling out, but honestly, it’s not really because of the day that it is. It’s because most of our friends happen to be off for the “holiday” and is the only time we can all get together for a cook-out. I feel like a hypocrite as I write this. I really do, and I’m embracing it. I truly am because I know all of that sounds like bullshit. Here I am, getting ready to condemn those who use this day as an excuse to party, when we’re planning on doing the same thing. Well, at least I can admit it. At least I can sit here and type and tell you all that yes, Memorial Day will be a cook-out day for us. But that’s not what the day is about.

I have seen so many social media posts containing memorials and articles and such, basically saying, let’s remember those who have fallen for our rights. Then they turn around and party at the beach, have cook-outs, get super drunk and don’t even think about the dead. It’s another day to party and have fun. It’s an excuse for a long weekend. It’s an excuse to hit up all the amazing sales and get new stuff dirt cheap. Why has everything become so commercialized anyway? A day for remembering the dead has turned into a day of fun, festivities and shopping. Those who died, died for us to be able to do all this fun stuff and to me it seems like we’re just spitting on their graves. I’d like to think that I take it a little more seriously than many do because I do remember them. I remember many friends who have died in service. I remember family members barely making it back alive. I know many friends who have lost family and friends of their own while fighting for this country. I keep in touch with troops, send care packages and such, but I guess the reality is, I’m a hypocrite because as stated earlier, we are getting together for a cook-out. Hindsight now tells me that if we truly wanted to honor those fallen, we’d have visited a military cemetery, those we know who have fallen, visited families of those who’ve lost loved ones, volunteered somewhere, something other than eating and drinking a few beers.

Next year I’ll be better and I hope the rest of the country will too.

who doesn't love a great house????

So, last year we HAD to renovate our kitchen. We had NO CHOICE. The floor literally fell through, with my son standing on it. Don't worry, no one was hurt. His foot went through a little and he was able to move quickly to avoid going any further. Turns out the water line running to the ice machine in the freezer had a hole in it. How that happened I have no clue! Regardless, it leaked under the cabinet and we didn't know because the subfloor under the ceramic tile absorbed it, held it and rotted everything underneath.

ANYWAY, I have chosen NOW, more than a year later, to become obsessed with house hunting and fixer upper shows. Perhaps it’s because there are so many other areas of this house that we still have to fix up and replace and renovate. It all sounds so exhausting just typing that. Watching these shows, I realize quite a few things we’ve done wrong with our renovations, however, at the moment, our kitchen and bedroom function and provide what we need. So they’re staying as is. Aside from learning a few things, I also realize how aggravated I get with these people. I realize it’s for entertainment, so obviously they only show us a select few when we really know they did more or showed more houses, however, you have to admit that you want to strangle most of these people upon watching these shows. Let’s start with the house hunting shows.

House Hunters

Budget:

I recently watched an episode with a blended family. When the husband and wife met, she had 5 kids, he had 2. They married and added one more. She stays at home. Doesn’t work. How in the hell can they afford a $1.685 million dollar home?????? She’s a widow so maybe she off’ed her husband for a sizeable life insurance policy. Who knows!?!? I just wonder how half of these people have the budgets they have. New college graduates with a $900k budget. Single mom with a $800k budget and 5 kids. REALLY!!!!

Lack of communication between buyers:

Clearly spouses do not communicate with each other before taping the show. Neither knows what the other one wants and they argue about what they like about each house. I’m honestly surprised they can knock all this down into a 30 minute episode.

Open concept:

I realize this is popular now. Don’t get me wrong, I love being able to be in my kitchen and look into the living room and see friends or family. However, I’m sick of people whining about open concept homes or lack thereof, when there’s actually a version of it in the house. What I mean by this, if there is a wall between your living room and kitchen but there’s a huge gaping cut out in the wall, big enough for people to jump through, IT’S OPEN CONCEPT DAMMIT!

Perfect house, minor imperfections:

Don’t get me wrong. I understand wanting your home to perfect, especially those desiring a turn-key home. However, if the only thing you dislike is paint color in a few rooms, get off your ass, buy brushes and paint and paint it yourself. Or if your budget is $200k and you get the home for $100k, PAY SOMEONE TO PAINT! It’s really that simple.

Speaking of imperfections:

If your budget is $200k, you’re not going to get all the amenities of a $700k home. It’s not going to happen. Face it. Deal with it. Get over it. You’re going to have to give on something!

Toying with other peoples’ stuff:

I realize many of these homes are “staged” but some are not. Some of that stuff really belongs to the people currently living there. Laying in their bed, crawling in their tub, not acceptable, in my humble opinion. It’s weird and creepy. Don’t do it.

Over budget:

I get that money is money. I’m poor by many peoples’ standards and I’m TOTALLY fine with that. I have friends, family and I do have somewhere to live. I’m good. However, if you’re looking for a home and it’s $1k over budget, you can afford it. Negotiation. Many people get homes for less than listing price so don’t stand on national television going “it’s so high and so much over budget!” Unless you’re RENTING, that’s not over budget.

Moving on…

Tiny House Nation/Tiny House Hunters

Basically, everything I said before still applies here, however, there is one other thing that drives me nuts about this show in particular.

It’s too small:

Well duh. What did you expect? You can’t say in front of the world, “we’re looking to downsize and lead a simpler life” and then turn around and say “but there’s not enough room for all my clothes.” Well again, it’s a TINY HOUSE. It’s meant for living and function, not indulging in millions of dollars’ worth of materialistic things. Plain and simple. I know it’s a transition but if you’re ready for the transition then you can surely get rid of some of your stuff.

On to the fixer upper shows!

Love It or List It

I absolutely love this show, however, I want to choke homeowners from EVERY SINGLE EPISODE.

Let’s start with your HOME renovations. If your home was built in the 50s and not updated, please do not give Hilary a tiny budget then get pissed at HER when you can’t have a brand new home because she found a leak in your water lines or something with the electrical that was hidden behind a wall. Be thankful that she kept your home from flooding or burning down. Seriously, there’s only so much she can do.

Something else that really annoys me about people and their budget. If your home is CURRENTLY valued at $700k and we all know that the value will go up with ANY renovations, then please, I don't want to see you get really upset over the perfect home that's $10-$100k over your budget of $750k. First of all, if you were selling your home as is, you were only borrowing $50k to begin with to purchase a new home. Assuming your homes value increases by $80-$150k, you'll be EARNING money from the sale of your home. You'll come out with a profit of $30k and above! I understand you borrowed money most likely to renovate your home, but you'll still come out either breaking even or with profit so stop grumbling about the home when you love it and it's perfect for your family. If you'll break even or come out with money in your pocket, GREAT. The last episode I watched, the new value of their home was $775k and the home they wanted was $800k. It was originally $50k over their budget and is now only $25k over budget. You're going to have to borrow $25k. That is NOT A LOT when your current homes original value, with no renovations, was $650k but you were going to purchase a home for $750k. You were willing to borrow $100k but now you're grumbling about borrowing $25k. I'm so confused.

If you’re unhappy in your space and David finds you a home with everything you need, where you want, at or UNDER your budget, then stop complaining about a paint color or placement of a staged couch! Seriously. All that shit will be gone when you move in or can be quickly taken care of with a paintbrush and paint.

Something else that kills me about people with spacious homes. If there’s only two people living in a 4 bedroom house with 3 bathrooms, a garage, a home office, a huge kitchen and a huge living room, please do not complain about space, when we can clearly see that 2 bedrooms look like an episode of hoarders and your living room has 8 chairs and 3 sofas. CLEAN UP AND ORGANIZE YOUR SHIT. If you have a 2000 sq. ft. home and there’s only two of you, you can make it work. Trust me. There are 4 people, 1 dog and 2 cats in my small double wide trailer and we’re just fine!

Fixer Upper

This show is just hilarious! Seriously. People BUY these homes with the intention of turning them into their dream homes but then complain about budget or issues with the foundation or having to rewire the entire home. If you pick the ugliest, most screwed up looking home, you should realize that it's going to be work and it's going to take money. Did you not think about what you were getting into before you went the route of a fixer upper??????

I'd also like to discuss one more show that I have recently become obsessed with and I have NO CLUE WHY! Flip or Flop.....

I love watching them turn something horrible into something great. What I don't get, is how they manage to get houses that have to be partially torn down and such. Ok, so there have been tons of episodes where they bought homes with non-permitted additions that have to be torn down and they get so upset because it takes away the value of the home because they lose a room. Explain to me how once they finish the home, they have to have an inspection before it can be listed and if someone makes an offer, it has to be appraised, but all this doesn't have to be completed when the home is originally listed and they purchase is to flip. Is it the sites they find the homes listed on? Is this some weird law that California has? I just don't get it. You would think if it has to be inspected and appraised AFTER being flipped, then it should be before it's sold the first time around.

Also, I'm getting sick of seeing them get screwed over because they pay someone to do a job and it has to be done again because the job wasn't done AND they have to pay again. Maybe this is a set up for television. I honestly do not know. However, I will say, if I pay someone to come out and level my foundation and I come in the next day and it isn't level, you can bet your ass they're coming back to do it free of charge or we're going to court. If I pay you to do a job, then do the damn job. Plain and simple.

Yes, I am basically jealous of all these people that can afford ANY of these homes, but that doesn't change the fact that I think they're all naive idiots!

school pickup and drop off etiquette

Ok. So I know that the school year is ending or has already ended for many of you, so let this post be a guide for next school year if your child is a car rider. I'm going to say that I am THRILLED the year is ending. I need a couple months of recuperation from dealing with the idiots on the road today, especially when it comes time to drop off and pick up of our children from school.

I know that all schools are different, have different pick up and drop off areas and may or may not have parking spaces in a designated area. Before I get into my rant, let me tell you a little about my son’s designated area. When you pull in the school there’s a small parking lot for staff and visitors. If you keep driving, there’s a loop that circles around to the side of the school where parents drop off or pick up their children. There are cones outlining a one lane section to drive THROUGH. It’s just that simple. You drive around the loop, drop off your kid and keep moving. In the afternoons we line up in the loop and pick our kids up as they are released and we keep moving. Plain and simple. Sounds easy enough right? Not for some people apparently, so let’s get started.

Drop Off Etiquette:

1. Our school day begins at 7:50. This means they want the kids in their classrooms by this time, not getting out of the car or walking into the school at this time. We’ve been late, several times this year but nothing that would cause a letter or phone call home. However, this doesn’t stop me from giving my child a kiss goodbye in the morning. Yes. He’s 12. However, in the world we live in lately, I don’t know if this might be the last time I see him or he sees me so we’re sure to always say I love you and give a quick peck on the cheek before parting. We do not however, take 20 minutes to say goodbye. So if I’m taking 2 seconds to say goodbye to my son and you’re behind me, do NOT beep your horn at me to move, especially if your child isn’t even all the way out of your vehicle. If I’m late, then you’re super late which means you didn’t leave early enough and did this to yourself.

2. With one in place, let me also say, there is no need to take 20 minutes to say goodbye. As you’re pulling up, do what we do. Say goodbye and give loving words as you’re coming to a stop. Give a quick peck on the cheek as they’re opening the door. Push them out and keep on rolling. Ok, don’t actually push them out but you know what I mean.

3. To prevent delay in the drop off area, have your and your childs’ shit together. Either before you go to bed the night before, or before you leave your house in the morning, have their bag packed, papers signed, homework completed and so forth BEFORE you get to school. Have your childs bag in their lap when you pull in so your kid can unbuckle, jump out and head into the school.

4. You do not need to pull up and PARK in the drop off lane and walk your child in. It’s about 10 feet from your car to the school door. I promise they can walk it alone. In elementary schools there are usually staff members outside so your little one WILL be safe. If you absolutely have to go into the school, then park in the PARKING LOT. Do not block the area where everyone else has to drive through.

5. With all that being said, I can make exceptions for kids with special needs. However, if it’s a wheelchair concern, no offense but you can still park in the parking lot. There’s a very nice flat smooth concrete walkway all the way from the parking lot to the school entrance.

Pick up Etiquette:

1. Be patient. We’re all there to pick up our children and we cannot make administration let them out any faster just because your child got out of the building before mine. They have a system in which grade levels are let out in a certain order. There’s nothing that you or I can do about it but sit and wait on our kid to get out. No need to get angry with one another.

2. Get. Off. Your. Phone. Seriously. Please. Ok, if you got there 30 minutes early, I understand spending some of that time on your phone. However, if the line is moving, it’s time to put the phone down and pay attention. First of all, there are moving cars that you could hit or could hit you. Secondly, in my son’s case, 6^th grade is still elementary school (they’re small schools) so there are lots of little kids out there. Yes, there are staff members watching the children, but we all know how quickly children can get away. If you’re not paying attention, you could smush someone’s child, or even your own.

3. If your child is old enough to be in the school, they can open a door and buckle a seatbelt. There is absolutely no reason for you to get out, bring their book bag around to the other side of the vehicle and then walk back around to get them in. All unnecessary. They can get themselves and their bag in the vehicle and buckle their own seatbelt.

Please people. It really is that simple. Seriously. Things would move a lot smoother and a lot more quickly if we just follow these simple rules.

Transgenders In the Restroom: Just let them pee!

I just want to point out that I am so sick of seeing this shit in the media. It brings out the worst in people. It brings out pure hate and has really shown me lots of peoples’ true colors. If I’m sick of seeing it, why am I writing about it? I want to have my final say because I’m sick of people asking me my opinion or bringing it up in conversation.

Let’s first point out, that this is a media tactic to distract everyone from other PRESSING issues. Seriously. We have people trying to kill us. Cops are being gunned down every day. Every day people are being gunned down every day. Kids are being bullied in school. Children are dying from random illnesses. But no, all you can see in the media right now is this transgender bathroom bullshit.

With this current issue, people only seem to think about a man walking in a women's restroom and molesting their daughter or raping a woman. THIS IS HAPPENING REGARDLESS! A man, dressed as a man, walked into a women's bathroom and molested an 8 year old girl recently. Where exactly did transgender play into this? Think I’m making it up to make a point, check out the article here. This is happening all the time, all over the place and it’s not happening by transgender individuals. People seem to think that word automatically means “child molester” or “rapist.” No, for the most part, it’s individuals who feel they were born into the wrong body trying to make it right for themselves. Let them be dammit!

Let's look at it this way for a moment. This could actually REDUCE the amount of bathroom incidents. Parents might actually start being parents and going in the restroom with their children instead of sending them in alone while they do whatever in the store. I cannot even count how many times I have witnessed a parent or parents let their children, small children, no older than 6, go into a restroom alone while they continued to shop, eat, or converse with friends. These kids are too young to be going in the restroom alone anyway!

Single parents with children of the opposite gender would be able to take their small children to the restroom without worrying about it being a problem. A parent would be able to take their handicapped teenager to the bathroom without worry. I realize there are family restrooms and handicap bathrooms all over the place, HOWEVER, not every location has these and many of the handicap stalls are found in the GENDER SPECIFIC bathroom. Handicap or not, parents get horrible looks for taking their seemingly normal teenager or grown child to a restroom not suited for their gender.

People might actually become MORE aware of their surroundings and the people in it and actually pay attention. Am I saying that women deserve to be raped for going in THEIR restroom and some douche follows them in? NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT, but this world is going to hell and people still seem to think they're safe in a random place. Maybe if they're that scared of being molested, they'll pay more attention to who's in the bathroom with them.

Ok, I’m getting off my soap box now. I just think there are so many hate filled people in the world, that they only see one side of the issue.