what the hell was I thinking???

So it took me four days to get straight to where I could actually type, make sense, sound like a real person again! All I can say, or question, is what the hell I was thinking???

Now I'm not doctor, but I can put two and two together and come out with five. Wait, no, it's four. It's four. Setting that aside, I know when something's wrong with me even if I don't know WHY it's wrong with me.

So for a year now I've been having stomach troubles. Alternating between diarrhea and constipation. Waking up in the middle of the night literally having to run to the bathroom. Gross right? Imagine living that life! It really sucks ass (no pun intended) to have to plan your meals around how long it'll take to upset your stomach. I missed a lot with friends and family because of bowel movements. So not the life I envisioned at the age of 31. I've also been suffering from severe indigestion for years but my regular doctor never referred me to a specialist. I've been on a medication for that for like two years that you're only supposed to be on for like two weeks at a time. No specialists, no second opinion (my fault), nothing. I've been on blood pressure meds for a year now.

Recently my doctor left town for another office elsewhere. I decided not to follow for various reasons. Ok, ok, I'm too broke and too busy/lazy to drive 50 miles one way to see a doctor unless it's a specialist since you don't have to see them often. Upon referral I started with a new physician closer to home. Just so everyone knows, I live in the boonies. The sticks. If my house were further off the road, people would swear we ate raw animals and produced moonshine for income. We don't. Anyhoo, on the first visit she decided to send me to a specialist to see if it's lactose intolerance, IBS, or something else. I haven't been yet as my appointment is a week from today.

Wellllllll, I was sitting here going through records while I was filling out paperwork for the GI specialist and it turns out that I've been on my BP meds as long as the stomach troubles have been occurring. Well duh! That has to be it. All my symptoms are after all, symptoms of these meds. I decided to stop taking them for a while. When I was first diagnosed with high BP, I never knew it until the doctor said "hey, your BP is awful high!" I've always had headaches and the occasional migraine but nothing that ever alerted me to any other problems. Apparently it was my BP. Anyway, point being, I stopped taking the meds.

For two weeks life was great! My BP was great every day. I had energy and no tummy troubles. It was great being able to eat again without worrying about missing a basketball game or a date night (not that we have many of those anyway) for fear of having to run to the bathroom or soil myself. I am ashamed to admit this happened more than once over the year. Thankfully never in public.

But what the hell was I thinking??? Coming off my meds without speaking to my doctor first was a huge mistake. Four days ago I got a migraine that left me for dead. Seriously. I laid in my bed, bawling like a baby which made things worse, sick to my stomach and even my tiny nightlight made my head pound. Yes, I have a nightlight. No. I'm not scared of the dark but we moved into our newly renovated master bedroom not too long ago and I got sick of stubbing my toe on the foot of the bed and tripping over the new rug. Falling face first into your own dresser gets tiring and damaging after a while.

After day two I gave up and took a BP pill. Nothing. I was expecting (more like hoping) it would work instantly. No such luck. I went one more day with a crippling migraine before I agreed to go to the ER if it wasn't better after a nights rest. Luckily, I woke up yesterday morning migraine free! No ER visit!!! Needless to say I'm back on my BP meds until I can visit my doctor and discuss a change in medication. I can't go through all that again.

Plus side is, my boyfriend felt sorry for me and got off his butt and cooked and cleaned and did all the laundry while I was down for the count. I told him I'd be sick for the next six months!!!